All These Words

 The 99 Names of Allah -  al-Asmāʾ al-Ḥusnā , the Most Beautiful Names are meant to unveil the nature of God. Each Name is a facet of the Infinite: mercy, peace, justice, wisdom, love, light, patience. Taken together, they form not a list, but a vision. And yet, across history, God has often been reduced to the image of a warlord’s deity that is partial, vengeful, insecure, demanding blood and obedience. But if we listen to the Names themselves, this image collapses. The Names expose the gap between divine transcendence and human narrowness. How can al-Raḥmān  - the Most Gracious - be represented by cruelty? How can al-Salām - the Source of Peace - sanction endless war? How can al-ʿAdl - the Just - delight in eternal damnation for disbelief? How can al-Wadūd  - the Loving - be mirrored in coercion and fear? The Names do not support this narrow portrait; they refute it. They open instead to a God beyond possession, beyond tribe, beyond violence. A God who is m...

  I’ve lived with epilepsy for close to 15 years now. I no longer call it a disease. I call it a doorway to the self. The first seizure came after a bout of typhoid - a collapse that no one saw coming, not even me. Since then, the episodes have struck without pattern. In restaurants. At family gatherings. On quiet evenings with friends. And once, curiously, in a moment of stress - right after I helped an old lady who had fallen. For the longest time, I felt powerless. I would slip, trembfle, vanish into unconsciousness. When I came to, I would apologize. Sometimes to others, sometimes to myself. But something shifted 5–6 years ago. The Aura as a Gate Those who live with epilepsy know what an aura is - a strange premonition, a soft shiver through the nerves, a fading of the edges of reality. In earlier years, it would always end the same way - collapse. But one day, as the aura hit, my mind cried out: “Varahi Amme… Varahi Amme… Varahi Amme…” Not a mantra I planned. Not a ja...